Trying To Think Again

Trying to think again, so strange,
So hard after so long.
Months of forced apathy
To deaden, not deal with the pain.

Emotions on hold, feelings numbed
One day at a time
No planning, No thinking
Afraid to hope, afraid to laugh

Now the thoughts drift up
Like smoke from a rekindled fire.
Up - out of the cave
Away from the hurt

Toward the light
Of a new life
Accepting who I am
What I am.

Allowing myself to
Feel again
Cry again
But this time
Not from pain, not from loneliness

Finding, along the journey
God and Peace
Friends and Joy
And for the first time
In many years
Hope.



Bill – Sept. 7th 2004
Re-worked Feb 2007